This author is not a male chauvinist! He desperately loves and needs his wife. He pastors a church which is beautifully perfected by strong, godly, and capable women. Not for a moment does he believe men are more wise, more gifted, or more valuable than women. As a matter of fact, he believes all churches, and almost all men, are terribly deficient without the partnership of the fairer sex. He reasons this is God’s view as well. For it was the all-wise Creator who created a perfect man, in a perfect garden, in a perfect universe, and then said, “It is not good that man should be alone. I will provide someone to help him.” By God’s design, women complete men. They are an incredible gift from God to the family, the church, and the larger society.
However, just as Satan is a perverted angel of light, so women can be perverted angelic counselors. Women, and wives especially, can be incredibly dangerous and disastrous to those who need their help.
Consider Eve: The fruit looked immediately satisfying. The serpent promised immediate wisdom. True, God had promised death upon consumption, but it looked so desirous for the moment. Therefore, because she valued short-term gratification over the long-term consequences, she partook of the forbidden food and encouraged her husband to follow her lead. This resulted in the expulsion of her family from the glorious garden. Additionally, this resulted in many of her children being eternally separated from God with their souls being cast into hell. Her advice was dangerous, and the consequences of following her counsel were disastrous.
Consider Job’s Wife: She saw the suffering of her man and wanted it stopped immediately. If Dr. Jack Kevorkian would have been alive, she would have made contact with him to see if they could have put Job out of his misery. Her advice to Job was, “Curse God and die!” Had Job heeded the counsel of his spouse, Satan would have been correct, and God would have been humiliated. Job’s pain was intense. Her pain was real. Her compassion for her husband was expressed, but her conclusion was devilish. Life was already incredibly tough for this righteous man without his wife encouraging him to please Satan and terminate his life.
Consider Sarah: She had longed for a child for many years, but her body would not cooperate. She heard God’s promise. She slept with her husband time after time hoping this might be the month. Finally she could take no more. Her body was tired. Her soul was tired. She was weary of hearing the promises of God and seeing the passion of her husband unrealized. So, in an effort to immediately fix the problem and bring about the plan of God, she encouraged Abraham, “Please go into my maid; perhaps I will obtain children through her.” (Gen. 16:2) From a short-term perspective, the problem was solved. Abraham was successful in sowing his seed; Hagar bore him a son. However, from a long-term perspective, God was displeased, Sarah was disappointed, Hagar was despised, Ishmael was divorced, Abraham was brokenhearted, and Israel has been suffering ever since. Sarah was another patriarchal spouse who encouraged her husband to make a short-term gratifying decision that proved dangerous and disastrous in the end.
So how do we apply this today? Women, make sure that you have a God-directed, long-term worldview. As you help the men around you by giving them counsel, make sure it is godly. Earthly sorrow and divine patience do not give one the right to take short-cuts. Encourage your husband to “man up.” Be his greatest cheerleader, and insist that he obey God despite his own sinful inclinations. As men, too often we want to dishonor God by eating, sleeping and worshiping wrongly. It is hard enough for us to “be the man.” Please do not help us compromise, take shortcuts, and wimp out.
Unfathomable Grace 